Tag Archives: women

Ladies, Back Off – This Scammer, I mean, Hottie – is Mine

 

You know, I could have titled this, “Ladies, Why Are We Keeping This Guy In Circulation??” but decided that perhaps showing you how to prevent from being scammed by online romances, you’d enjoy and even learn more about how this guy operates, by reading my interaction with him, and perhaps, give this man some peace knowing, you’re not making it easy for his (handsome) pictures to be used again.

But first, let me share a few facts about him/this picture that I know so far:

  • These pictures were hacked by the scammer(s).  This interaction is NOT the man in the picture.  Trust me, myself and the 2,000+ women who was contacted with these pictures wish with ALL OUR MIGHT that it was him. Aside from being just beautiful to look at, he is also presented as classy, romantic, and everything a woman could want. (Good listener, rich and ready to travel with you, sending roses, talking with you, etc)
  • He, (The Scammer, which from here until otherwise noted) has approached women on Match.com, Facebook, LinkedIn, and Instagram.  I was approached on Instagram.
  • The pictures have been in circulation since 2012.
  • His aliases include, Malcolm, Evan (on Linkedin), Michael (on Facebook), Chris (Match.com), Jason (on Instagram). My guy’s name was Jason.
  • He gets more clever, for the next victim, every time the current victim ‘corrects’ him on something weird.
  • According to scam sites that detail these pictures, the scammers come from Ghana or Nigeria.
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  • He is never able to do a video chat and his camera never working.
  • Says he’s an avid football fan.
  • He asks you for Amazon gift cards, Itunes, Moneygram, or Western Union to help 1.) save his business, 2.) help his ‘daughter’
  • Says he lives and works in Los Angeles – lol, for those who live in LA, wait until you see the address he gave to his HOUSE..
  • Gave a social security number, which, worry not, I already reported to the police for possible fraud activity.
  • He is always a widow and since 2016, has a 5-year-old – still to this day.
  • He asks you to open a PayPal, Verizon or AT&T account, which has your social security number and bank information, to help him.  He didn’t accept the Paypal account I opened in his name, with the social he gave me. He played dumb, and so was I
  • He worked like clockwork on a schedule, always saying when he was eating, walking his dog, bathing his ‘daughter’, eating steak – he was so good, I was questioning and doubting even myself.
  • Even though you are talking to one scammer, other women are also talking to other scammers, using the same pictures, because, well, if ain’t broke…(hopefully, this blog breaks it)
  • He tries to get the victims off the site he met them as quickly as possible, using either email or a disposable, prepaid phone with either a LA number or Houston number.
  • There is a forum of women, heartbroken or angry, about how they were duped by him (the con-artists)

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Understand, I share this for two reasons – 1.) To make public these pictures so the scammers can finally leave him alone, and 2.) I can come to a full resolve by sharing how easy I was duped while at a vulnerable moment, perhaps saving other women, years from now.

You see, he called me wifey. He wooed me, and, after a few months, we made had wild, passionate online sex. I even sent him nudes (sure,  later he used to extort me. I laughed and offered pictures with better lighting – I was so shaken up and angry. I’ll share more later.) He and I broke up and got back together MANY times. He claimed our love was destined by God.  He even helped me with figures of my business while I was doing taxes, (though I don’t remember him speaking of his taxes at all). But we prayed together. He took me church with him and his daughter.  Funny how I was able to detach for my clients and do the background search for them when I was a matchmaker, but neglected to do it for myself.  The divorce took a toll on me.

He was one of my biggest fans. But when I shared that I was coming out to LA, he questioned me.  I always knew the flags were there, that this was a fantasy, but I yearned for that bond, the intimacy and fantasy he provided me. I was hooked.

But every time I get weak, I read the texts where he blames me for his mental illness recurring; the urging for me to open a Verizon/At&t account and give him the passwords; the narcissistic accusations that I’m not helping his business with my mistrust of him, and not doing as he asked of me.

Our text interaction will perhaps be in the book, entitled, What if F**ks Are All You Have to Give?

 

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Coming Home – Forgiveness Through the Mad Search of Finding Love

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“A certain man had two sons. The younger son said to his father, ‘Father, give me my share of the inheritance.’ Then the father divided his estate between them. Soon afterward, the younger son gathered everything together and took a trip to a land far away. There, he wasted his wealth through extravagant living, wild parties, drugs, and loose women. 
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“When he had used up his resources, a severe food shortage arose in that country and he began to be in need. He hired himself out to one of the citizens of that country, who sent him into his fields to feed pigs. He longed to eat his fill from what the pigs ate, but no one gave him anything. When he came to his senses, he said, ‘How many of my father’s hired hands have more than enough food, but I’m starving to death! I will get up and go to my father, and say to him, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you.  I no longer deserve to be called your son. Take me on as one of your hired hands.” ’ So he got up and went to his father.
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“While he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was moved with compassion. His father ran to him, hugged him, and kissed him. Then his son said, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I no longer deserve to be called your son.’ But the father said to his servants, ‘Quickly, bring out the best robe and put it on him! Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet! Fetch the fattened calf and slaughter it. We must celebrate with feasting because this son of mine was dead and has come back to life! He was lost and is found!’ And they began to celebrate.
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“Now his older son was in the field. Coming in from the field, he approached the house and heard music and dancing.  He called one of the servants and asked what was going on. The servant replied, ‘Your brother has arrived, and your father has slaughtered the fattened calf because he received his son back safe and sound.’ Then the older son was furious and didn’t want to enter in, but his father came out and begged him. He answered his father, ‘Look, I’ve served you all these years, and I never disobeyed your instruction. Yet you’ve never given me as much as a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends.  But when this son of yours returned, after gobbling up your estate on prostitutes, you slaughtered the fattened calf for him.’
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 Then his father said, ‘Son, you are always with me, and everything I have is yours.  But we had to celebrate and be glad because this brother of yours was dead and is alive. He was lost and is found.’” – Jesus, Luke 15:11-32
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The Right Way and Wrong Way to Chase Him

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True story.

A long time ago, I had a very good friend who found Jesus the same time I did.  We understood heartaches, trauma, and overcoming.  We were like peas in a pod and really didn’t think of looking at each other in any other way but  through a platonic friendship.

But one evening, when we were sitting in his car after a bible group meeting, I remember (vaguely, but I do remember some things), crying about feeling unloved and unattractive to men.  I poured my heart out to him and being the good friend he was, he listened.

Then he said , “Shakira, one day you’re going to find a man and he’s going to be lucky to have you. He’s going to love you and you’ll see you’re worth it!”

Well, and if you didn’t know where I was going with this, I immediately thought he was talking about himself, so suddenly, the “scales fell from my eyes” and I started to like him. A lot.  I mean…… – a lot.  And unfortunately, it was one sided. Yep, I took words from a friend and made them – no, molded and forced them to be something they werent.

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As a matter of fact,  I told everyone in church he was going to marry me and be mine.  I told God (bwahah) that he was husband and to go ahead and make it happen.  I remember calling him in the middle of night one night to say something (important to me, but really drama!) and hearing him say, “Shakira, you’re scaring me. Are you drunk?”

UGHHHH!

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“OH, he WILL marry me one day!”

Ok, lesson learned – friendship forever ruined.  WRONG WAY – FAIL! Bye Felicia! …

A few years later, I went to live on the other coast and attended the singles group.   All the women were very close knit and comfortable and secure with the men to go out on dates, hang out and just be friends.  A new guy came in to the mix and all us women were checking him out.  He was sweet and attractive and fun.  He and I went out on a date which was at the gymnasium he taught at and it consisted of jumping in a pit of foam balls. IT WAS CRAZY FUN!!  But I didn’t really pursue him. In fact, another friend of ours in the group had her eyes on him and in so many words made clear that she was going after him.  I don’t remember her carrying on like I did, but I do remember it just being implied.  I think because we all loved each other, the women rallied around her to encourage it to happen. We prayed over her (and him unbeknownst).  I remember her doing little things for him, giving baked gifts to him.  They went out on a few dates and during that time I moved again.  The next thing I knew there were wedding announcements.  They are still together with two kids and are strong for each other.

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Both of us women are Christians, but I believe her maturity spiritually, socially, and mentally allowed her to not speak about her conquest before getting counsel, prayers, and confirmation.  I simply stated what I wanted and set about to loudly make him love me – which is why I put that picture above. That’s probably how I came across.  My friend, on the other hand, was able to control her emotions enough to not question him, but get to know him and stay in prayer.  Her friends, who she trusted, gave her great advice and served as her sounding board.

Many women over 28 – no, 35… no 43,… ok 50, swing in the pendulum of all or nothing.  Either there are no guys around to consider, (many times meaning there’s a bit of loner-ism to them) or they settle for the worst possible choice.

I even had a client who enjoyed her online dating experience because although she did want to marry one day, she wanted to enjoy herself out on a date.  When she finally did meet the man she would later marry, she made the comments of why they were waiting to exchange nuptials.  She proposed to him! Five years later, they’re still married strong.

Why not get a little bold – with self-control?

Yes, I was humiliated, but the awesome news is we’re all married to our chosen ones, without regrets.  Although the friend and I no longer speak, I’m so incredibly grateful he wasn’t the one.  As my own marriage grows and my husband and I get to know each other each day, I wouldn’t change it for the world.

Is there anyone you’ve had your eyes on?

Some have resorted to this .   Click and find out if this works for you.

If you want my services go here to go to the site and let me help you find love today!

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