Tag Archives: relationship

I Will MAKE Him Become What I Want in a Husband!

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Yep, me, over here.

I knew as a daughter of God, I would live happily ever after – I truly believed and trusted that concept. Only my actions weren’t adding up.  In fact, I found myself in relationships where, in my heart I knew it wouldn’t happen or where my behavior proved I didn’t believe it was ever going to happen.  In each of these relationships, I believed if I just did something more, or if I just prayed hard enough to get him to change his ways, or if he saw my pious ways then he’d convert and we’d be champions for God! Ughh!

A friend asked me recently why I thought I got myself in these situations and why we argue with our husbands and all I could tell her was I wanted a guy who could be sensitive and sympathetic like a woman without being a woman, but be a man.

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I’m so glad there is clearly a Divine sense of humor. And grace. Lots and lots of grace in thinking how much of a “b–” I was.  (Side note: And why some women seek to reach that level on a daily basis, and then complain of relationships not working for them, I’ll never understand,) but anyway…

This topic, though seemingly simplistic, is one that stupes many of us women who are or were seeking.  What is it about that guy that has us to both, agree to exchange nuptials and simultaneously draws us ever more into wanting to change him? Why?

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We can spend forever asking why, but all I can say is that it is so important to make sure you are not falling in this mindset. That’s what makes each of us a wonderful, comical mystery to unravel and discover and appreciate. If you are doing this, and don’t like the contents inside, staying ‘for the sake of not hurting his feelings doesn’t work. If you’re finding that you’ve shared your heart and intimacy and he wants to change you, or you feel compelled to compromise yourself, or lose yourself in his wants, to be who he wants, it’s safe to say unless you prefer to not think for yourself, you will never be satisfied.

So where are you in your relationship?

Ready to take the profile questionnaire?  Find out if you are truly compatible matches, or see what you need to work on by contacting us here.

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Narrowing Your Search (Attracting Your Perfect One)

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Everyone who is pursuing love or, is honestly seeking long-lasting compatible love, it’s very important that they take the time to answer for themselves, questions BEFORE starting a relationship.

Ok, that’s not written in stone, but I can tell you of numerous success stories of those who knew what they wanted for themselves and in their partner when they did take the time to answer some deep questions.  It just saves everyone time.

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Taken from Mohan Kumar’s post http://docmo.hubpages.com/hub/Teaching-and-Assessing-Attitudes

Even companies have a code in which they are built from and what the customer can expect.

There are many attractive, people and some who can charm their way into the lives of unsuspecting love-lorn dreamers, but those same attractive people never make it past acquaintance for those wise ones.

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These are just general questions to consider.  However, it’s VERY important to understand that regardless of your view or lifestyle, how you answer these questions truly do speak volumes in regards to the type of person you attract.

When working with individuals, I ask some of these and more direct individualized questions to properly assist the client.

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  1. What level of commitment are you looking for?
  2. How do you define “being spiritual”?
  3. Do you see yourself as spiritual?
  4. How do you define God?
  5. Do you believe there is a need to have a relationship with a power higher than yourself?
  6. How do you define a committed relationship?

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  1. Do you believe; it’s more important to be ethically sound or morally sound; or both or neither?
  2. What is your personal belief system?
  3. Do you believe your personal beliefs influence the outcome of your romantic relationships?man_in_love_1
  1. What do you believe the role of a husband is or should be?
  2. What do you believe the role of a wife is or should be?
  3. How do you define marriage?
  4. How honest are you, to yourself, in revealing the number of relationships you had being based solely on looks or hook-ups?

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Hopefully this can scratch the surface into your own knowledge of yourself.

In the meantime, as I get over the sniffles, assist clients, and complete the auditions, rehearsals, and shows going on lately, I will be back as quickly as I can to continue this and get you ready to BOLDLY face February with both barrels loaded!

p.s.  My husband and I have awesomely resolved the differences.  Thank you for your comments and support from earlier!

Until later!

S. Arikah Nash Baly-Jensen, Founder, Two Hearts Offline Matchmaking and Two Ships

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