Yep, me, over here.
I knew as a daughter of God, I would live happily ever after – I truly believed and trusted that concept. Only my actions weren’t adding up. In fact, I found myself in relationships where, in my heart I knew it wouldn’t happen or where my behavior proved I didn’t believe it was ever going to happen. In each of these relationships, I believed if I just did something more, or if I just prayed hard enough to get him to change his ways, or if he saw my pious ways then he’d convert and we’d be champions for God! Ughh!
A friend asked me recently why I thought I got myself in these situations and why we argue with our husbands and all I could tell her was I wanted a guy who could be sensitive and sympathetic like a woman without being a woman, but be a man.
I’m so glad there is clearly a Divine sense of humor. And grace. Lots and lots of grace in thinking how much of a “b–” I was. (Side note: And why some women seek to reach that level on a daily basis, and then complain of relationships not working for them, I’ll never understand,) but anyway…
This topic, though seemingly simplistic, is one that stupes many of us women who are or were seeking. What is it about that guy that has us to both, agree to exchange nuptials and simultaneously draws us ever more into wanting to change him? Why?
We can spend forever asking why, but all I can say is that it is so important to make sure you are not falling in this mindset. That’s what makes each of us a wonderful, comical mystery to unravel and discover and appreciate. If you are doing this, and don’t like the contents inside, staying ‘for the sake of not hurting his feelings doesn’t work. If you’re finding that you’ve shared your heart and intimacy and he wants to change you, or you feel compelled to compromise yourself, or lose yourself in his wants, to be who he wants, it’s safe to say unless you prefer to not think for yourself, you will never be satisfied.
So where are you in your relationship?
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