Up until now, I would hope you have been following the common thread each post carries – in order to find the relationship you’re looking for, you’ve got to be clear-minded and healthy in your own mind to be able to recognize the best fit for you.
It’s important to bring your heart out last when building the relationship because, as the saying goes, love is blind. “Love” or strong feelings brought about by coddling the ego, or eros, makes the woman make excuses for the man who is, not just wrong for her, but toxic in nature. “Love” is what makes the guy believing that the girl who says he’s just too nice for her holding on to hope that one day, she’ll come around and see him as that great guy.
I’ve met many people who say they are ready to date, yet digging deeper and listening to them, many times they have unrealistic expectations set on the potential person – should that person ever decides to come forward. And all that is really covering a fear of the unknown, a bit of hopelessness, and impatience while looking at their proverbial inner clock.
So how does one know that he or she is ready to date?
Well, for starters:
1.) Do you feel comfortable enough to approach someone on your own and striking up a conversation to actually get to know the person, or are you mentally qualifying them in your mind? (p.s. ladies, this goes for you, too!)
2.) Do you feel your breathing get more rapid when you think about going out for the date?
3.) Have you let yourself go in appearance, with the mistaken attitude, of “love me like this, or leave me!” ? (p.s. really, if you don’t expect to consider someone when they have let themselves go from being their best self to sub-par, stop with the double standard!)
4.) Does it feel like work for you to enjoy being in the company of others?
5.) Are you involve in extra-curricular activities to meet people – where you can shine?
6.) Are you polite to those who serve you? (side note, a friend of mine ended up marrying the waiter who served her when she was out with her friend for lunch.)
7.) Can you honestly say if you been “picky,” which can be, without you realizing it be either snobby, judgemental, or unapproachable (i.e. would you be able to play the main character of, “The Taming of the Shrew?”)
8.) Can you go on dates and just enjoy it for what it is, or are you already interrogating them in your mind? (sidenote; MOST marriage minded people do, which puts them in a mindset of really not enjoying the moment)
9.) Are you polite enough to thank them for their time or are you thinking of how to get to kiss or sleep with the person.
10.) Can you flirt without being a tease or making sexual connotations? (hint: a smile can mean all the difference)
11.) Can you wear clothes for the first few dates that are modest enough to where the person does not have to be staring at your body all night, but actually hear what you’re saying, to allow them to get to you for you, or do you feel your body is what will keep the person coming back? (Classy, not trashy – that goes for both men and women)
12.) Can you allow yourself to make mistakes and flub up the date and extend the same grace for the other person?
Well if so, you’re on your way. Even if you’re shy, feel awkward, or have too much of a hectic schedule, you can still meet have amazing dates that will lead you to your “one.”
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